The Potter and The Clay

Isaiah 64:8

But now,

O Lord,

thou art our father;

we are the clay and thou our potter;

and we all are the work of thy hand.

Since I was saved on April 17, 2011, I have had a journey of new learning.  I've many teachers that have now stepped into my life and they have all done a remarkable job teaching me the Bible and the lessons that lay within.  I remember reading the verse above and feeling the impact on my new Christian life.  I AM THE CLAY which means that I also have a potter that will transform me into something much more beautiful that just a lump of clay. 

When I got saved, I took it all very serious.  I felt God drawing nigh that day, asking me to draw nigh to Him.  I could have refused but instead I ran to church and asked Jesus into my heart.  I felt the presence of God as he presented that opportunity and I knew that I wasn't going to reject Him.  Now what?

With Jesus Christ as my Savior, and the Holy Spirit dwelling within me to guide and teach me...I was ready to be molded.  The process started immediately!  I used to be a horrible "cusser".  I used curse words my entire teen/adult life.  In fact, they were the worst curse words ever and I used them almost every other word.  I didn't care who was around to hear them and I'm certain that I offended many people over the years, including my sweet little nurse Karen.  The day that I was saved, on April 17, 2011, I walked out of the church and I really began to notice within hours that I hadn't been cursing, nothing even close.  The day that I was saved, the curse words just left my vocabulary!  That was amazing!  I've had people ask me if it was hard giving up the cussing.  I've replied that it hadn't been the least bit difficult, no struggle at all...those words simply left my vocabulary, for good!  Only God would have been able to remove them so simply! 

There are still things in my life that God is busy with.  Busy with molding, pinching things away, cutting out parts, and smoothing the rough edges.  This process is sometimes painful.  When God gets to certain areas and needs to cut away an ugly part...it hurts!  But he offers his love throughout it all and it's his love that shines through and sustains me.

I know that God is busy right now with me because I have submitted to His will.  I have been praying about some private issues and asking for things that I would like in my life IF they are His will.  I made a promise to myself that I would be still and quiet and listen.  I want God to use me for His Glory!  I want God to mold me into a person that Glorifies God!  I've learned that it's never about me or you for that matter....that it's ALWAYS about our Lord Jesus Christ!

Behold,

as the clay is in the potter's hand,

so are ye in mine hand.

Jeremiah 18:6

The Lord is My Shepherd

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: He leadeth me beside the still waters.

He restoreth my soul: He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. ~ Psalm 23

Psalm 23 is probably the most well known Bible verse. It's among one of the first passages that children learn in Sunday school and is often the passage that adults then turn to for comfort. It can guide us through life, and it's a comfort to my heart to KNOW that I have a Shepherd in Jesus Christ. Now, if I'm willing to accept that I have a shepherd then I must also be willing to accept that I am one of His sheep.

That's sometimes difficult for people to accept this fact, that we are sheep. Sheep are not known for being the smartest creatures or the strongest of creatures. In fact, sheep are helpless creatures that need constant care and supervision.

God likens us to these helpless animals in Isaiah 53:6, "All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all." So if indeed we are sheep, then there is no greater undertaking to accomplish than to know our Shepherd.

Within the sheepfold of humanity, there are only two kinds of sheep: those who are saved and those who are lost. And within the realm of the sheep who have been saved, there are those who stay close to the Shepherd and those who stray from His protection. I prefer to stick close!

John 10:27 says, "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me." God will always lead us in the right direction if we learn of Him and listen to Him. When I got saved I made a decision right then and there, that I would learn as much as I could about Jesus Christ and the Word of God. I never want to be led astray away from my Lord and the best way to prevent that from happening is to read the Bible daily, talk with God daily, and strive to hear His voice and understand His direction. It is so comforting to me that Jesus KNOWS me and KNOWS my name! In fact, He knows me better than anyone on this earth, ever! And...He loves me, more than any love I could ever know from another person. He loves me despite me being a sinner!

My only regret so far in my life is that I wasn't saved a year ago. I was so lost when my father died last year and I was not able to offer anything to him during his last days except my presence and even that was weak. He was frightened and I was frightened. I could tell by looking at his face those last days that he was not at peace and was scared. I'm a doctor and was panicking because I couldn't help him or fix him. I just didn't know Jesus Christ then and had nothing more to offer my father. I don't know if my dad was saved or not.

I have made a vow that I don't want anyone I know or meet to not have the opportunity to know Jesus Christ, and to accept Him as our perfect Savior...our loving Shepherd that gives us everything we could possibly need in this life. There is coming a day...when it will matter.

Psalm 48:14 "For this God is our God for ever and ever: he will be our guide even unto death."

~ excerpts taken from the book "The Heart of the Shepherd" by Stephen Chappell

HEBREWS 13:5

There's only one constant in life, and that is change. I am the poster child for change. I've been on the opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to lifestyles and opinions. However, my latest change in lifestyle/opinion has been, by far, the most grand and the most rewarding! What is my reward? Eternal life...

Let me back up and start somewhere towards the beginning. I did not grow up in a Christian home. I sometimes think how wonderful that may have been to have had a life where my family attended church and relied upon God to get them through the tough times, and there were many tough times. However, that was not my lot in life. My parents were very good parents and raised three children that are all very high functioning adults, each with a good moral foundation. My mother taught us to not steal, cheat, or lie...I thought as a child that had I done any of those things, and she ever caught me...she would have buried me in the backyard and told everyone that I ran away!!

I was raised in a small town. Many of my friends did attend church with their families at a local Southern Baptist church. At the age of 12, I decided that I wanted to be like my friends and attend church. So, I would ride the church bus on sunday mornings and attend sunday school and services. Everyone at the church was nice enough, but I always had the feeling deep down that I just wasn't as good as my friends because my parents were not there with me. The preacher also scared me to death because all of the sins he preached about, that would certainly land you a place in hell with fire and brimstone, were sins that I could pretty much just go home to. Well, after a few months, I was saved and then baptized. I took this very seriously and tried with all my heart to live as a Christian. I would even ask my parents to attend with me...non-stop begging that always ended up with a firm...NO! I was frightened beyond measure that all of us were going to burn in hell for eternity!

This went on for about 9 months, but my life as a Christian had an abrupt ending when the preacher made an unexpected visit to our house one Saturday morning. It was my mother's routine to deep clean the house on Saturdays and I always had to help. This particular Saturday, we were busy cleaning and the doorbell rang. My mother answered the door, holding a cigarette in her hand. Ok, in my 12 year old mind...maybe the cigarette isn't such a bad thing but oh, wait a minute...HER T-SHIRT!!! OH NO, SHE'S WEARING THE MOST RUDE, LEWD, SEXUALLY ORIENTED T-SHIRT IN THE WORLD (remember, 12 year old mind)! My mother was wearing a t-shirt that her sister had given her as a gag gift. She would have never worn it out in public, remember, we were deep cleaning the house. The shirt showed two pigs mating and had the inscription saying "Makin' bacon". I was horrified! The preacher now knows that my parents are sinners and my life was over!! (again, 12 year old mind) I was too embarrassed to return to church.

Fast forward to my mid twenties. I began searching for some sort of spirituality. I landed firmly into the pagan community and considered myself a witch. I was fully equipped with the latest and greatest herbs, wands, potions, garments, jewelry, spells, and broomstick! I practiced witchcraft for years and even led people to that lifestyle. I had patients that even came to me simply because I was a witch and could offer alternative medicine many times. I read, studied and knew my craft very well...but, no matter how much I tried to convince myself of my spiritual health, it just never completely satisfied my spiritual hunger. Something just wasn't right!

At the age of 49 I began to spiral into a deep depression. I'd had 2 failed marriages and one failed long term relationship. I found myself alone and very depressed. One day I bought a book titled "Our Daily Bread". It was a small book in a leather looking cover with a cute cow on the front. I truly only bought the book because of the way it looked, I didn't care about the contents. I threw it aside and pretty much forgot about it. Several months later I had hit the bottom of my personal pit and was sitting alone one weekend feeling like I was the most "alone" person in the world. I cried most of the weekend and the word that kept creeping into my thoughts was ALONE! I woke up Sunday morning April 17, 2011, and I grabbed my cigarettes and that cute little book and went to the garage to smoke and cry some more. As I sat, smoking my cigarette, I picked up that cute little book and decided that I would just randomly open it and read what it had to say. I opened it randomly and I just about fell out of my chair. At the top of the page, in large letters....NEVER ALONE, Hebrews 13:5 ...I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. A feeling came over me and I was constrained to get to a church! It's difficult to describe the feeling but I knew that I HAD to go to church and accept Jesus Christ as my Savior. I had not been to a church in this town except one time previously, back in 2007.

In 2007, I was on call one day and a very sick, dying man came to the hospital. His name is Greg Hawn and he is the pastor of Tabernacle Baptist Church. I took care of him for 21 days in the hospital and got to know him and his wife a bit during his hospitalization. He knew a little about me also. He and his wife were very kind to me and never judged me. He got better and the church invited me to attend his first sermon back after the illness so that they could give me a plaque thanking me for taking good care of their pastor.

So fast forward to April 17, 2011 when I jumped up and knew I had to attend a church....aahhhaaaa I'll go to the only church I knew of, Tabernacle Baptist Church. I sat through the sermon and I was amazed because it felt like Pastor's sermon was directed at me, that he somehow knew my story and prepared a sermon just for me. I was saved that morning and baptized the next week, on Easter Sunday. The day I got saved, I told Pastor and his wife that I was hitting the ground running and I wasn't looking back...and I haven't looked back! I have been so hungry to learn God's Word and to learn how to have a relationship with our Lord. I've started my discipleship with Pastor's wife, Kim. I enrolled in Bible college and attend class every Thursday. I've surrounded myself with Christian people that have helped me in so many ways. They've been role models, teachers, fellow Christians but most of all...they've been my friends. ~Proverbs 27:17

Now, does this mean that I'm pretty perfect? Nope, not at all! I'm still a sinner, but because of God's grace and mercy, I'm a sinner that will go to heaven and have eternal life. ~John 3:16